1) What is the meaning of pakikiram and what situations can I use it in?

2) Why are there many different ways to say something simple like 'I am Sorry' in Tagalog? I am seeing 'Paumauhin' and another word 'Patawad'. From what I heard, Paumauhin means Excuse me but then there are people saying it also translates to..'I'm Sorry'.

3) Do filipinos like being direct? I heard that someone said its very common for filipinos to be direct unlike other asians but it was said that asian culture doesn't like people being too direct, otherwise its considered rude. Do filipinos consider that rude or do they like it and also communicate very directly? I feel like they are influenced by USA so I felt like they are likely to be direct with other people, but I haven't really talked to a person in Tagalog yet.. What do you think?

I hope someone can answer these 3 questions.

Question

1) What is the meaning of pakikiram and what situations can I use it in?

2) Why are there many different ways to say something simple like 'I am Sorry' in Tagalog? I am seeing 'Paumauhin' and another word 'Patawad'. From what I heard, Paumauhin means Excuse me but then there are people saying it also translates to..'I'm Sorry'.

3) Do filipinos like being direct? I heard that someone said its very common for filipinos to be direct unlike other asians but it was said that asian culture doesn't like people being too direct, otherwise its considered rude. Do filipinos consider that rude or do they like it and also communicate very directly? I feel like they are influenced by USA so I felt like they are likely to be direct with other people, but I haven't really talked to a person in Tagalog yet.. What do you think?

I hope someone can answer these 3 questions.

ekiboiii · Answer

1) There is no such word as "pakikiram" in Tagalog, but i think you meant "pakikiramay" which means sympathy. To use this word, you have to conjugate pakikiramay (which is noun) to nakikiramay to make it a verb. Example: nakikiramay po ako. (My condolences.)

2) There are many ways to say sorry in Tagalog but usually "I'm sorry" is commonly used and more understood.

a. Pasensya - informal and casual (literally means    patience)
   
   1. Pasensya - general use 
   2. Pasensya po - polite 
   3. Pasensya na - insistent 
   4. Pasensya na po - polite and insistent

b. Paumanhin - this sounds more formal and deep and is translated as "Excuse me" (literally means "let it pass")
   
   1. Paumanhin - general use
   2. Paumanhin po - polite
  
   c. Patawad - a more formal word is used when someone is asking for forgiveness (literally means forgiveness and pardon)
   
   1. Patawad - general use
   2. Patawad po - polite

3) It really depends on the person if they're direct or not, but Filipinos are generally polite to foreigners and will tell you the truth as honest and as polite as they can. Normally, Filipinos are direct or honest to each other if they have a close relationship.

hope this helped :)

kikiks · Answer

1. Pakikiram? I assume you’re pertaining to the word„Pakikiramay“? Pakikiramay means Sympathy.
example: Taos pusong pakikiramay sa pamilya ng namatayan. 
(Sincere „sympathy“ condolences to the family of the deceased.)

2. You can use both Paumanhin/Patawad when asking forgiveness.
but sometimes when you’re in a Market or store and you like to bargain for the price of an item we use „Patawad“
example: Ang mahal naman po, (pertaining to the price of the item)Pwede patawad?
It is so expensive can you please lower the price? (literally) we use „po“ to make it more polite.

3. Filipinos can be both. direct and sensitive at the same time. It is true that some really likes people to be direct when talking to them but as for me it is a case to case basis. Like if you’re one of my close friends or a colleague maybe, then it is okay for you to be direct like literally in all aspects but if you don’t know me and we just met I think it would be rude.

I hope this helps.

Leo-chan · Answer

1) "pakikiramay" -> damay (root) = to involve; to implicate

in this context, when someone offers to pakiramay with you, they are offering their sympathies to be involved with your struggle. that's why they say that.

2) Paumanhin = Apology
"Paumanhin po." = "Apologies, sir/maam."
Patawad = Forgiveness
"Patawad po." = "Please forgive, sir/maam."
Pasensya = Patience
"Pasensya na po." = "Please be patient now, sir/maam."

3) I think it's a mixed bag, sometimes people can be direct, sometimes they can be indirect too. Sometimes some terms when analyzed are actually indirect in meaning but we use it so often that the meaning has made it sound direct when plainly used. Normally, people are direct and honest, unless they are not that close to you and don't want to offend you or are pressured in groupthink scenarios where they are often implied to conform or risk being disliked by their peers. This part is the asian behavior that is still core in philippine social behavior. People may think individualist liberal thought is progressive but collective conformist thought at the core still rules people's behavioral thought and actions. If people feel they are restricted from being direct and honest, they will become shy and withdrawn, otherwise if you let them be confident, they will feel you are friendly and freely be direct with you. People are always afraid of bosses or hierarchical relationships as is normal among asian societies, so for some filipinos they get used to lowering themselves before others, hence in a deeper sense, many try hard to please foreigners to compensate for any perceived deficiencies and inequalities of the country.

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